As the year winds down, so do many of us. Or at least, we try.
For Black women who lead in movements, ministries, nonprofits, classrooms, and boardrooms, the holidays can bring a mix of joy and exhaustion. Cooking and caretaking. Reunions and reminders. Festivities, yes — but also fatigue.
In a culture that often demands our labor and denies our rest, the holidays become a site of quiet resistance. It’s where we slip away from the grind, if only briefly, to remember that our worth is not tied to productivity. As Tricia Hersey of The Nap Ministry reminds us: “Rest is a form of resistance because it disrupts and pushes back against capitalism and white supremacy.” In her words, “Rest is a birthright.”
This truth resonates especially during the holidays — a season where expectations run high and so does burnout. For Black women, rest isn’t just personal. It’s political, ancestral and necessary.
Audre Lorde, the legendary poet and activist, once wrote: “Caring for myself is not self-indulgence, it is self-preservation, and that is an act of political warfare.” It’s a quote that’s been passed down like scripture in many circles, a reminder that caring for ourselves is also a way of protecting our communities. When we prioritize our healing, we shift the terms of survival.
Mental health advocate and actress Taraji P. Henson has been vocal about the toll that constant stress takes on Black women. In a recent interview, she confessed: “I was just becoming a robot. I wasn’t present. I wasn’t really smiling. I wasn’t happy. I just didn’t care.” For her, reclaiming rest meant seeking therapy, launching a foundation for Black mental wellness and saying no to grind culture — even when it’s celebrated.
That refusal to perform exhaustion is echoed by many Black women who are crafting new models of leadership. Models rooted in care, ease and boundaries. For some, it’s spending the holidays in solitude. For others, it’s reconnecting with chosen family. And for many, it’s unplugging altogether — no emails, no updates, no “just one quick call.”
The Black Emotional and Mental Health Collective (BEAM) champions this shift. Their work reminds us that healing isn’t an individual responsibility — it’s a collective process. They promote rest, grief work and emotional justice as central to Black liberation. During the holidays, that looks like more than bubble baths and candles. It’s about reimagining how we care for ourselves and each other.
And as Maya Angelou once affirmed, “You alone are enough. You have nothing to prove to anybody.” That message feels especially urgent now, in a world that constantly demands receipts for our rest, metrics for our downtime.
The Nap Ministry calls this “resting as reparations.” It’s a powerful idea — that rest itself is part of the work. That stillness is a strategy. That holiday recharge is not an escape from our roles but a return to ourselves.
So whether it’s lighting candles or saying no, taking a nap or taking a walk, the practice of rest is sacred. And for Black women, it’s also strategic.
We do not rest because we are weak. We rest because we are wise.
Because we know the world will not slow down for us. Because we’ve learned through burnout and brilliance, that slowing down is how we survive.
This holiday season, may we honor that truth. May we honor ourselves, just as our fierce Black women leaders told us to.
